3 steps to let go of Perfectionism

As an interior designer, I used to wear perfectionism as a badge of honor.  I thought it meant I was conscientious and had a high standard of excellence.  I thought being a perfectionist was necessary to help me do my best work.  

Over the years, I began to see that my perfectionism was actually hindering, rather than helping me do my best work and I began to take steps to get over it already!  Here are some of the pitfalls of perfectionism. 

Pitfall 1: It makes it hard to do our best work

Isn’t it interesting that what we think perfectionism is doing for us - helping us do better work - is actually the OPPOSITE of what is really happening?  The bottom line is perfectionism is paralyzing, and it’s nearly impossible to do our best creative work when we’re afraid of making mistakes.  It’s the opposite of creative freedom.  As creative people, we need the freedom to explore and make mistakes. Remember this mantra: Perfection is Paralyzing.  We must let go of perfectionism to do our best work. 

Pitfall 2: It leads to self-hatred

Let’s just get it out of the way that perfection is not a thing in the real world.  Trying to achieve it is setting us up for failure every time.  Yet, despite the fact that it’s literally impossible to be perfect, being a perfectionist means you’re going to beat yourself up every time you fall short of perfection in any way. 

When I was a perfectionist, I can recall the INTENSE shame I would feel every time I made a mistake.  I would beat myself up internally and really felt that I had no business trying to be an Interior Designer if I couldn’t do it perfectly [insert an avalanche of negative self-talk here].  

Perhaps part of me thought this was helpful in some way and if I beat myself up that would prevent me from making mistakes in the future.  The actual result was that I became paralyzed in my fear of making mistakes, and it became harder and harder to do my work at all.  Not exactly the result I was going for!

Pitfall 3: It leads to procrastination

Did you know that perfectionism is one of the leading causes of procrastinaion?

It’s no coincidence that when I was deep in perfectionism I was a chronic procrastinator.  If you’re waiting for your work to be perfect so you can complete it, you’re going to keep putting it off because it’s actually impossible to reach perfection.  

Deep down some part of you knows this, so you keep putting your work off, and off, and off, hoping that if you just give it more time you’ll be able to reach that elusive state of perfection.  Eventually the deadline arrives and you have no choice but to turn in the work, regardless of its imperfections.  You tell yourself if you “just had more time” you could have made it perfect.  Alas, maybe next time.  And the cycle continues.  

Constant procrastination is a terrible way to live in our businesses.  While we’re procrastinating, we’re hating ourselves for putting off what we know needs to be done.  We can’t enjoy what we are doing while we’re procrastinating, because we feel we really should be doing our work.  When this becomes chronic, it can literally steal the joy out of all of life’s moments, and make it hard to enjoy our “time off.”   Procrastination is a huge joy-stealer in our businesses.  

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Okay, so hopefully I’ve given you some insight about the dangers and pitfalls of perfectionism.  So, how do we let go of perfectionism in our Interior Design Businesses?  

1: Change your mindset about “perfect”. 

Remember, you’ve been sold a bill of goods when you leaned that perfection was a thing. It is not.  It literally does not exist in the material world as we know it.  So let go of the idea of perfect.  Not only does it not exist, but you don’t need it to.  Here’s your new mantra whenever you find yourself putting of your work because you’re trying to make it “perfect”:  “Done it better than perfect”. 

2: Make it okay to make mistakes. 

As a perfectionist, we hold ourselves to an impossible standard, and believe we deserve to berate ourselves if we make mistakes.  It’s time to flip that script.  Everyone makes mistakes.  There is no perfect human on earth.  You may not be able to prevent mistakes from happening, but you can control how you talk to yourself when they do.  The next time you make a mistake and start down that path of negative self-talk, take a beat and tell yourself instead that you just had a human moment.  You are a human.  It’s okay!  Practice being kind to yourself when you make mistakes, the way you would to someone that you love.  As you do that, you will build trust with yourself, and you’ll start to lose your fear of making mistakes.   Decide that even when you make mistakes you’re going to have your own back.  How empowering does that feel?  

3: Empower yourself.

As a perfectionist, it’s easy to beat ourselves up when we make mistakes, spending hours (or days) trying to rewrite the past wishing it would be different.   Instead of obsessing over what could have been done in the past to make things different, instead, empower yourself by focusing on what can be done now to take responsibility and fix the problem.  Is there anything you can do in your business to prevent this mistake from happening in the future?  Would it help to create a checklist, or other safety net?  Focusing on what you can do to prevent this mistake in the future takes you out of victim mode and makes you feel empowered.  

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I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that it’s easy to release the perfectionism that has plagued you your whole life and simply find a better way.  This is a practice.  For years, I called myself a “recovering perfectionist”.  This meant I would still fall into all the old mental habits of perfection, but that I was starting to become aware of them, and practice being more kind to myself instead.  Over time, perfectionism plagued me less and less, and I rarely suffer from it these days.  

Letting go of perfectionism is going to feel awkward at first, like writing with your wrong hand.  You’ll worry that if you’re not berating yourself for making mistakes, you will make more of them.  

But over time, I’m confident that what you will find instead is that you will embody a whole new sense of self-love and freedom in your business.  You’ll make it okay to be human - for yourself and others (yes, others will notice and feel more comfortable around you as well!).  

When you make a mistake, you’ll have your own back and talk to yourself kindly.  Instead of being paralyzed by shame, you’ll proactively work to fix the mistakes and prevent them in the future.  

And instead of being constantly stuck in procrastination, you’ll feel free to get your work done, completed and out out the door - good enough.  

I can tell you from my own experience that there’s a serious joy surge waiting for you as you let go of perfectionism.  It’s a journey worth taking!  

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If you’d like some more guidance in this, set up a free discovery call with me HERE.  We can talk about ways I can support you in letting go of perfectionism in your Interior Design business so you can achieve your goals without beating yourself up  in the process.  

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Just a couple of days left to join us in our Winter Cohort for the Design Roadmap Course.  There is no better time to get your systems organized than the beginning of the year, and there is no better way than in a group setting like this, where you will meet new designer friends and get the camaraderie and support of the group!  We’re better together!  CLICK HERE to sign up!